Trusting God Amidst Loss of Beliefs and Self-Identities

I Have Met the Stranger and He is Me...
http://peterrollins.net/?p=3611

by Peter Rollins

posted 27/3/12

To believe is easy. You can fill stadiums with people wanting to believe, either to solidify what they already think or to grasp hold of something because they feel cast adrift and lost at sea.

To doubt, to interrogate your fear, to really question what you believe, that’s difficult. It’s difficult because we want to protect ourselves from doubt and unknowing. Indeed when we encounter somebody who is different from us, our first experience is often to see them as monstrous, as having beliefs and practices which are alien and stranger and historical and contingent. When we encounter them we either want to consume them, make them part of our social body, or we want to vomit them and get rid of them. Or perhaps we want to have some sort of interfaith dialogue where we can talk about where we agree.

In each of these experiences we seek to minimize our encounter with the other. We seek to domesticate them. In the first, I’m right and they’re wrong, and I want to make them into a version of me. In the second, I’m right and they’re wrong, and I want to get rid of them. In the third, we’re both right.

But in the genuine encounter with the other, we start to see ourselves through their eyes, and instead of seeing their beliefs as monstrous, we start to see our beliefs as monstrous. We see our beliefs as contingent, and historical, and alien, not just to them but to ourselves.

It is in this experience, when our beliefs begin to fracture and fall apart and our political, religious, and cultural narratives begin to fracture that we know what it is to experience a type of crucifixion. For the cross was a symbol of curse. The person was killed outside the city. They weren’t part of the political structure. They were no longer part of the cultural system. They were no longer protected by the religious leaders. They were the complete outsider. They were crucified naked and alone.

When we experience the loss of our beliefs, when we experience the breakdown of our narratives, it’s not there where we lose God, it’s there where we stand side by side with Christ.

The Damage We Do When Not Accepting and Loving Gays and Homosexuals

Confessions of a Gay Christian
http://www.relevantmagazine.com/life/relationship/blog/28785-confessions-of-a-gay-christian

Nate Smith

April 4, 2012

 

We live in a society where we feel that as individuals nothing can shape us or harm us. We are free thinkers only influenced by what we want to be influenced by. The reality is, that is totally false.

 

Erik Erickson was a developmental psychologist who proposed that as a person grows through different life stages. At each turning point, there needs to be room to have an “identity crisis”. This allows for the individual to adapt—or not—to their circumstances. Different stages can be revisited if the internal struggles are not acknowledged. The success of a person’s development is affected by outside influences.

 

As a person who has grown up in Christian culture and of a homosexual orientation, I have come to realize that I have never fully been able to trust until this year. And I am 27-years-old.

 

My dad was in the military until middle school and then became a pastor. The fear of the Lord and rigidity of religious rules weighed heavy in the household. Matters of faith and theology were never to be questioned. Before I even started thinking about my sexual orientation, I happened to become friends with a guy who was “out” in my freshman year of high school. We communicated through letters and eventually I gave him my number. My dad found out who he “was” and I was instructed not to associate with “people like that”. The friendship ended. My dad became vocal about Disney supporting the gays. As a family we joined the boycott against Disney and “those homosexuals.” I remember hearing about the Matthew Shepard murder and started wondering why the Church hated them.

 

After high school, I started working at a Christian bookstore. Employees were allowed to take books home to read and return them at their leisure. I snuck a copy of Desires in Conflict, a book published by an ex-gay ministry. I remember seeing the “gay” spectrum. I thought to myself that I wasn’t that “gay” and maybe could move closer to heterosexuality. The next week, a co-worker made a comment about the flamboyant men who purchase the “gay” books. I laughed it off and wondered if he knew.

 

A year later, I attended a short-term Bible school in Spain. After numerous suicidal nightmares, I walked to the beach and yelled at God. I needed Him to show His face, to give me mercy and love because the Christians I knew hated people like me. The next morning, my ability to soak in Scripture was like night and day. God had showed up, but my secret was kept to myself in fear of others.

 

I started to become honest with others at 22-years-old. I came out to my professor through an assignment I had written and to many friends. An immense fear of others resurfaced, and I started to hate myself again for my orientation. My college friends showed me love, but I knew it was time to tell my family. Before heading to Georgia, I kept watching Valerie’s story in V for Vendetta. She shared this: “I remember how the meaning of words began to change. How unfamiliar words like ‘collateral’ and ‘rendition’ became frightening, while things like Norsefire and the Articles of Allegiance became powerful. I remember how ‘different’ became dangerous. I still don’t understand it, why they hate us so much.”

 

My worst fear of being thrown out of the family did not happen. However, I was left deeply damaged. Questions arose like “How did we raise you?” or “Have you prayed enough?” or “Your friend, Toby, is he your lover?” Yes, I knew how I was raised; yes, I prayed relentlessly for this to stop; and no, Toby was not my lover, nor did I ever have one.

 

Despite my suicidal ideations, I headed to Costa Rica for a year-long internship. I was upfront about my “struggles”, which led to being questioned about male friendships that developed. I had to have surgery while in Costa Rica, which resulted in easy access to pain medication. The medication caused hallucinations and my four year struggle of suicidal thoughts became a reality as I consumed a cocktail of pills. The 30 minute race to the hospital was accompanied by the director, his wife and my roommate. With an unpredictable heartbeat, I kept saying, “The man said, ‘Homosexuals must die. Homosexuals must die. They are all going to hell.’” I was put on schizophrenic medication and two months later went to finish my final year of college. Deeply broken, I partook in some prayer counseling, which was immensely helpful until it turned into reparative therapy to change my attraction to men. The American Medical, Psychiatric and Psychological Associations are all in agreement that reparative therapy is harmful to clients. Why are evangelicals still doing this? After a few sessions, I stopped going. I questioned if there was a place for me in the Body of Christ.

 

In 2010, Jennifer Knapp released Letting Go, which spoke directly to the emotions I had. Lyrics like I’m the one who keeps it on the inside // so they’ll leave me alone radiated what I lived by, just so I could have normal relationships with people.

 

In October 2011, I read Love is an Orientation by Andrew Marin. He placed emphasis on the Gospel and not orientation. Christ’s love and acceptance goes way beyond this. I stopped viewing my sexual identity as something to fight against. As a result, I am off all medications, suicidal ideations have stopped and I lost the 45 pounds that I gained in less than 2 years. I finally began to trust in myself and who God is.

 

The highest at-risk group for suicidal behaviors is found in celibate, self-identified homosexual males at 46.1 percent with an attempt rate at 15.5%. I am both of those statistics. Do I remain celibate? If I do, how do I gain a sense of community? Even the idea of having a guy roommate results in Christians telling me to “warn” my roommate about “who I am.” I am then questioned about whether I will be “tempted.” Should I be forced to live alone like a leper?

 

The environment we are in has great impact on who we become. Christian culture can help a person flourish into who God wants them to become or burn them alive. I love my family and consider myself God’s son. Christian culture has influenced me to remain celibate, but I don’t “struggle” anymore. I just question if I am remaining celibate to appease my Evangelical family or friends and wondering if that statistic will reappear in my life.

 

Nate Smith is obsessed with chai tea and lives in the Bluegrass state.

He writes at psychosiswar.wordpress.com and tweets at @smithbrooks.

 

 

 

 

Recommended: Children Adoption Agency Holt International

http://www.holtinternational.org/



"Be a hero to a child today and help an orphan."



International Adoption

Post-Adoption Services
Get Adoption Information
Adoption Webinars
Application to Adopt
Ways to Give



Holt International Children's Services
P.O. Box 2880 (1195 City View) Eugene, Oregon 97402, USA
Phone: (541) 687-2202 Fax: (541) 683-6175
Office Hours: 8:00 am to 4:30 pm, Pacific Time

  

Ways to Give -

https://secure2.convio.net/holt/site/Donation2?1580.donation=form1&df_id=1580

  

Who We Are — Holt International

Finding Families for Children

The love we experience as children enables us to thrive. It fuels us. Molds us. Nurtures our developing minds.

At Holt International, we help orphaned, abandoned and vulnerable children to thrive by finding families to love them. Families in the form of trained caretakers who assume the awesome task of nurturing children awaiting adoption.

And the adoptive families who will love and nurture children… forever.

Moved by faith and a firm belief that all children deserve permanent, loving homes, Harry and Bertha Holt began their lifelong mission in 1955. Overcoming legal and cultural barriers, they sought families for children orphaned by the Korean War.

With this act of love, two farmers from rural Oregon revolutionized international adoption.

Today, Holt International strives to uphold their vision: to find loving homes for children regardless of race, religion, ethnicity or gender.

Our Mission

Holt International is a Christian organization committed to expressing God’s compassion for children. While always upholding the highest ethical standards, we: Find and support permanent, loving families for children who are orphaned, abandoned or at serious risk of separation from their family Provide services to ensure that children will grow and develop to their fullest potential Lead the global community in advocating on behalf of the world’s most vulnerable children

Our work is their legacy

Established overseas for more than five decades, Holt is the model for international adoption. World leaders seek our expertise. Child welfare organizations embrace our partnership. We helped formulate the Hague Convention, an international treaty that sets ethical standards of practice for adoption. And through innovation, determination and collaboration, we continue to raise the standard of care provided to homeless and at-risk children throughout the world.

Though we've grown, our ideals remain constant. We still believe the best care comes from a loving family – the right family. Each child has a story. Each child's circumstances are unique. Thus we always explore the possibility of reuniting Holt children with their birth families.

We have one goal: to give all children the love they need and deserve. Whether by birth or by adoption – to a domestic family or a family in the United States – this is our passion. This is our purpose.

To adoptive parents, we offer this assurance: international adoption was the best solution for your child.

Winter Jam 2012

http://www.jamtour.com/

 

SKILLET

 

Skillet - Awake and Alive (Official Music Video HD) Lyrics, Subtitulado, Legendado

Skillet - Hero

Skillet - Whispers in the dark (Official Music Video HD) Lyrics,Subtitulado,Tradução,Traduction

Skillet - Rebirthing (Official Music Video HD) Lyrics, Subtitulado

Skillet - Monster (Video)

NEWSONG

NewSong - One True God

Newsong - Rescue

SANCTUS REAL

 

Sanctus Real - I'm Not Alright

Sanctus Real - Lead Me

Sanctus Real - Forgiven

Sanctus Real - Whatever You're Doing (Something Heavenly)

PETER FURLER

of Newsboys

"Something Beautiful" by Peter Furler and Paul Colman Easterfest 2011 Mainstage

Peter Furler - Reach

Peter Furler - Matter of Faith

 

Peter Furler - Psalm 23

KARI JOBE

Revelation Song - Kari Jobe

"Healer" - Kari Jobe Live Performance

Kari Jobe -You Are For Me HD

BUILDING 429

Building 429: "Where I Belong" Official Music - Video Take This World and Give Me Jesus

Building 429 - Listen To The Sound

Building 429 - Made For You

GROUP 1 CREW

Group 1 Crew - Live It Up (Official Video)

 

Group 1 Crew - Movin' (Official Video)

DARA MACLEAN

Dara Maclean - "Yours Forever" Live (The Cannery Row Sessions)

Dara Maclean - "Nothin' You Wont Do" LIVE (The Cannery Row Sessions)

Dara Maclean - "Suitcases" Live (The Cannery Row Sessions)

FOR KING AND COUNTRY

Busted Heart - For king & Country

For King & Country - People Change - LIVE In Nashville

For King & Country - Missing

WE AS HUMAN

We As Human - Broken Inside

We As Human- hypocrite

We As Human (Double Life)

NICK HALL: SPEAKER

Resurrection Music for an Easter Sunday (Rock's "All Time Greatest Heavy Metal Guitar Solos")

Ok, so I was thinking about discovering the "Greatest All Time Heavy Metal Guitar Solos Ever" and started picking through a few to listen to (I've listed the Top-10 further below) when I came across Pink Floyd's "Comfortably Numb" hit from their 1979 double album, The Wall. And as I was listening I began to think just how this might make really great resurrection music to accompany a Christian believer, journey-bound to heaven, on that fateful day when death comes stealing in to greet us. Then suddenly, the next thing I knew, I was thinking of Jesus and if David Gilmour's rock solo hadn't likewise accompanied Him as He arose from sin's foul grave?! Who did leave Hell's gaping maw as its dark lord, Satan, and his untold fetid minion millions, stared helplessly upwards cruelly witnessing their inglorious, fallen reign, coming to a resounding end on Resurrection Day's first inaugural Easter celebration!

But mind you, not to any angelic strings wafting through the airs as Jesus ascended upwards. But to Gilmour's burning frets set on fire proclaiming Jesus as Lord amidst deafening strains of Hallelujahs as the rock soloist wailed his troubling chords over the turbulent fires of faith and disbelief. Cheering some hearts and bowing others listening to discordant riffs parting a sea of humanity to bring the Creator-God nearest to man through His Son's crucified death risen to bring salvation to all. And crying - 

"Messiah Christ has risen!
He who is First Born from the dead.

Who has conquered the grave.

Who has laid open the way to heaven from hell.

Who has given victory to every blood-washed sinner

Baptised in the holy name of the King of Kings.

Sing 'Hallelujah!' Jesus is Lord of All!"

So then, see if you can't visualize the same with me as you listen to Pink Floyd "Ascension" music, and watch the stadium lights flash and burn, beholding in your mind's eye Jesus ascending to heaven, and us with Him, on that glorious Day of Resurrection.... Then close your eyes and listen again. And this time really hear the heavenly strains of "Hallelujah" breaking across the broken shores of heaven while breathing in the celestrial airs washing across the lungs and soul proclaiming, "Salvation has come to the sons of men by the great goodness of God everlasting...."

skinhead

March 31, 2012

Pink Floyd - Best Guitar Solo Of All Time

Comfortably Numb Guitar Solo

Revelation 19
English Standard Version (ESV)

Rejoicing in Heaven

19 After this I heard what seemed to be the loud voice of a great multitude in heaven, crying out,

“Hallelujah!
Salvation and glory and power belong to our God,
² for his judgments are true and just;
for he has judged the great prostitute
who corrupted the earth with her immorality,
and has avenged on her the blood of his servants.”<sup>[a]

3</sup> Once more they cried out,

“Hallelujah!
The smoke from her goes up forever and ever.”

⁴ And the twenty-four elders and the four living creatures fell down and worshiped God who was seated on the throne, saying, “Amen. Hallelujah!” ⁵ And from the throne came a voice saying,

“Praise our God,
all you his servants,
you who fear him,
small and great.”

The Marriage Supper of the Lamb

⁶ Then I heard what seemed to be the voice of a great multitude, like the roar of many waters and like the sound of mighty peals of thunder, crying out,

“Hallelujah!
For the Lord our God
the Almighty reigns.

⁷ Let us rejoice and exult
and give him the glory,
for the marriage of the Lamb has come,
and his Bride has made herself ready;
⁸ it was granted her to clothe herself
with fine linen, bright and pure”—

for the fine linen is the righteous deeds of the saints.

⁹ And the angel said^[b] to me, “Write this: Blessed are those who are invited to the marriage supper of the Lamb.” And he said to me, “These are the true words of God.” ¹⁰ Then I fell down at his feet to worship him, but he said to me, “You must not do that! I am a fellow servant^[c] with you and your brothers who hold to the testimony of Jesus. Worship God.” For the testimony of Jesus is the spirit of prophecy.

The Rider on a White Horse

¹¹ Then I saw heaven opened, and behold, a white horse! The one sitting on it is called Faithful and True, and in righteousness he judges and makes war. ¹² His eyes are like a flame of fire, and on his head are many diadems, and he has a name written that no one knows but himself. ¹³ He is clothed in a robe dipped in^[d] blood, and the name by which he is called is The Word of God. ¹⁴ And the armies of heaven, arrayed in fine linen, white and pure, were following him on white horses. ¹⁵ From his mouth comes a sharp sword with which to strike down the nations, and he will rule them with a rod of iron. He will tread the winepress of the fury of the wrath of God the Almighty. ¹⁶ On his robe and on his thigh he has a name written, King of kings and Lord of lords.

¹⁷ all the birds that fly directly overhead, “Come, gather for the great supper of God, ¹⁸ to eat the flesh of kings, the flesh of captains, the flesh of mighty men, the flesh of horses and their riders, and the flesh of all men, both free and slave,^[e] both small and great.” ¹⁹ And I saw the beast and the kings of the earth with their armies gathered to make war against him who was sitting on the horse and against his army. ²⁰ And the beast was captured, and with it the false prophet who in its presence^[f] had done the signs by which he deceived those who had received the mark of the beast and those who worshiped its image. These two were thrown alive into the lake of fire that burns with sulfur. ²¹ And the rest were slain by the sword that came from the mouth of him who was sitting on the horse, and all the birds were gorged with their flesh.

* * * * * * * * * * * *

Saturday Top 5:

[Greatest] Rock and Roll Guitar Solos

http://thecitizencane.wordpress.com/2008/07/12/saturday-top-5-rock-and-roll-guitar-solos/

July 12, 2008

[All of the guitar solos have been lost since this article's 2008 publication. Consequently, the youtube references have been updated by myself with apologies to the author's original selections. - skinhead]

I love music. And of all music, I like rock and roll most. At the heart of all great rock is the guitar, and the guitar shines today in the top 5 greatest guitar solos. Included in the list are a few songs that had the juice to make honorable mention, but not enough to crack the list.

Honorable Mention:

Hotel California – The Eagles Easy sounds from this southern rock band gave it such a nice feel. I still haven’t figured out what the song is about, though I have read things ranging from Satanism to music history (with references to Steely Dan and many other rock greats in the song). But the solo is just killer. Definitely one of the greatest rock solos ever.

Eagles - Hotel California - Live '76

Reelin’ in the Years- Steely Dan This is the closest to pop of any songs on my list. It actually was the #1 pop tune of 1973. But the guitar solo is totally rock. Steely Dan is jazzy enough for your mom and dad to enjoy, rockin enough for me, and about the most sophisticated rock and roll created. The solo on this track is Jimmy Page’s favorite solo of all time. It’s not every day you can find a guitarist who can come close to replicating it.

Steely Dan - Reelin' In The Years-Whistle Test 1978

A rare Steely Dan performance from old grey whistle test

(the episode broadcasted in 1978; the performance is early 70's).

Jeff Skunk Baxter is on lead guitar.

Whole Lotta Love – Led Zeppelin There are many who say Jimmy Page’s hammering on Stairway was the best solo of all the Led Zep tunes, but this one had more emphasis with the breaks. I gotta whole lotta love for this song and this solo!

LED ZEPPELIN London Live 1970 - Whole Lotta Love / Com Breakdown (Finale)

Led Zeppelin performing Whole Lotta Love during their United Kingdom Tour

in the Royal Borough of Kensington and Chelsea, London, England.

Recorded live at Royal Albert Hall on January 9th, 1970.

Long Time – Boston Off the self titled album, this was the best of Boston’s killer guitar solos in my opinion, and there were plenty to choose from.

[HD] - Foreplay/Long Time - Boston

One of the greatest songs in the world, (no this isn't just a Tribute).

By one of the greatest bands ever. So there.

Take it. Hard. On the chin. Period.

Europa – Santana This song was the closest of the honorable mention selections to making the top 5. If you think Black Magic Woman contained his best solo work, you are incorrect. You can feel the heat coming off those tubes in his Mesa Boogie. Wikipedia has the parameters for attaining the sound Santana had on Europa, supposedly. He really makes the guitar sing, scream, and then cry.

Europa - Santana (Live in Mexico 1993) HD
Sacred Fire

Do You Feel Like We Do – Peter Frampton This was the best video I could find of this. The sound quality isn’t the best, but it still has the voice box and guitar solo. This tune is energetic, and the solo rocks in a big way that is worthy of mention on my list.

Peter Frampton Do You Feel Like We Do

Midnight Special 1975 FULL

Peter Frampton's performance at Burt Sugarman's Midnight

Special, c.1975. This is the full version, unlike the other ones

floating around with the end missing

The “Top 5″

#5 Comfortably Numb – Pink Floyd The smoothest work by a seriously smooth guitar player. Quite a few regard this as the best guitar solo ever laid to vinyl in the Rock and Roll genre. David Gilmour punctuates a song about an apparent injection of something that takes away pain. According to some of the information I found, there was nothing to the drug rumors other than that it was about a child that got sick and got shot up with some medicine to feel better. Of course, the term “acid rock” is actually a description of the effects of acid rain on a sheer mountain face. YEA RIGHT! Any way you slice it, the solo is one of the best ever.

THE BEST - Pink Floyd

Comfortably Numb - PULSE - HD

"Comfortably Numb" released on the album "The Wall" in 1979,

was written by David Gilmour and Roger Waters. David's guitar solo

was voted number 4 of all time by Guitar World magazine readers.

#4 Eruption – Van Halen Eddie sets the fretboard on fire with some of the fastest hammering ever recorded. Actually, he was so fast many of the notes were supersonic and undetectable to the human ear. That’s how amazing this solo was! The link is to a live version with a little more than the original recorded version.

Eruption - Van Halen

Rare 1982 Footage

#3 Sultans of Swing – Dire Straits Is it rock and roll? You better believe it! There’s no trumpet playing in this song, and the solo(s) are just as effortlessly smooth and fast as the combination can be. One of my gun range instructors used to say “Slow is smooth, and smooth is fast!”. I love the clean bends and flat picking Knopfler brings with his guitar here on this slightly altered live extended version.

Dire Straits - Sultans Of Swing (Alchemy Live)

The most eagerly anticipated release from Dire Straits - their seminal live

concert recording  'Alchemy Live' restored to pristine high definition visual clarity,

remixed in PCM Uncompressed Stereo and Digital 5.1 Surround Sound.

Available on Limited Deluxe Edition DVD and Hi Def Blu-ray.

#2 Free Bird – Lynyrd Skynyrd It’s technically not a guitar solo when played live since it’s a duel between Allen Collins and Steve Gaines (Ed King originally), but the recorded version was double tracked and recorded by Allen Collins alone (still not exactly a solo). But since the 5 minute guitar piece at the end of the song is one of the most recognizable portions of rock and roll picking in rock’s history, I have to include it. The haunting slide played in the beginning of the tune is by Gary Rossington. That makes it a three part solo.

Lynyrd Skynyrd FreeBird [HQ] (LIVE) 1977

Oakland, July 4, 1977

#1 Little Wing – Stevie Ray Vaughan This is the ultimate in Rock and Roll guitar solo, an extended version of Hendrix’ Little wing with a portion of Third Stone from the Sun at the end. It’s a buffet of all you can eat blues/rock!  It has some serious rock foundation to it, but the soul of this jam session is pure blues. It’s sad that such a talented guy (the greatest guitarist to live) didn’t live longer. To quote Bill, how much music was lost when he died? He had years of creativity, writing, recording, and performing taken away when he died in a helicopter crash at the age of 35. When you watch him play, he makes it look so easy.

Stevie Ray Vaughan- Little Wing Live

There you have another controversial edition of Saturday Top 5. If you think I am wrong, then you are wrong, obviously. I welcome anyone to challenge my list so I can prove to them why I am right.