When I first bled,
as the wound became a river.
This solitary act, this pained experience,
every ripple a hard memory.
Preface
Facing the Wound
At its heart, this phrase suggests that what heals us is not the avoidance of suffering, but our encounter with suffering - by facing, integrating, transfiguring, and transforming the very experience we would wish to avoid. In a culture often trained to numb itself, flee from pain, or try to dominate it (sexual addiction), this claim is not merely therapeutic; it is ontological.
To explore this idea, we must move through several interpretive frames:
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Fregean Semantics: how our language within ourselves might collapse the distance between “remedy” and “experience.”
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Psychoanalytic Theory: how our wounds become either integrated or projected onto others.
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Phenomenological and Existential Philosophy: how suffering is lived, inhabited, and given meaning.
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Metamodern Cultural Analysis: how individuals and communities navigate through the pained oscillations of hope and fragmentation.
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Whiteheadian Process Thought: how each experience participates in our own creative advance as well as the world itself.
By integrating these perspectives, we can see how wounds may become either wells of healing or weapons of harm, depending on whether they are faced or fled away from. This is not only a personal reality but a collective one with families, communities, and societies. Experiences whether good or bad which can, and well, shape ministries, movements, violence, and political orders.
Introduction
From Harm to Healing - An Experiential Metaphysics
The question of why people seek to heal or to harm is one of the oldest in human history. Philosophers, theologians, psychologists, and mystics have all wrestled with the mystery of how suffering shapes us - and why some turn their wounds into compassion, while others turn them into cruelty.
The phrase “The remedy is the experience” captures a key insight into this mystery. It recognizes that:
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Pain, once faced, can become formative for good or for ill;
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And yet, Pain, once denied, can also become very destructive.
Ministers, therapists, caregivers, and healers often enter their vocations not in spite of their wounds but because of them. Ministry, in particular, often becomes an arena where personal pain is re-encountered in the guise of service, theology, or spiritual practice. When that wound is engaged consciously, it can generate deep empathy, humility, and creative vocation.
But the same dynamic is visible on the dark side of human behavior. Individuals who enact violence - whether interpersonal or ideological - often operate from unintegrated, unresolved, suffering, attempting to reclaim agency or suppress vulnerability through domination, control, or scapegoating.
The wound that is not transformed is inevitably transmitted.
Philosophically, this reflects an ontological bifurcation point. Each moment of suffering becomes a processual occasion in which novelty may emerge - either as healing (a wellhead of nurturing) or harm (an evolving weapon of destruction). Whiteheadian process thought gives us a powerful vocabulary to describe this:
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Prehension of the wound,
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Integration or negative prehension,
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Subjective aim, and
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Creative advance toward new possibilities.
Psychoanalysis, meanwhile, provides the clinical language of repression, transference, and projection. Phenomenology grounds this in lived experience; existentialism gives it ethical weight; metamodernism situates it within our cultural moment of oscillation, precarity, and shared longing for meaning.
This is not simply a private dynamic which inflicts only the wounded. No, wounds scale: personal pain can become collective ideology, and, collective trauma can become structural violence. But the reverse is also true: personal healing can ripple outward, shaping communities of care, faith, and justice.
The remedy is the experience because it is only through turning toward the wound that individuals and societies can generate new patterns of personal and corporate becoming.
This is not a deterministic model.
At each juncture, transformation remains possible. That is the heart of process philosophy: even distorted experiences can be re-integrated into new patterns of becoming.
Conclusion
The Wound That Becomes a Well, or a Weapon
In process-relational terms, every wound is an actual occasion in the universe’s unfolding. It is never inert. It is taken up into new occasions through prehension and interpretation. The question is not whether the wound will shape the future — but how.
When the wound is faced, felt, and integrated, it can open into deeper empathy, creating spaces of care, compassion, and creativity. Ministers and healers who work from their pain with honesty often become well-springs of communal grace.
When the wound is denied, repressed, or projected, it becomes a weapon, breeding cycles of harm, resentment, or ideological violence. Many forms of cruelty arise not from strength but from disavowed fragility.
When wounds are collectively mirrored, they can shape entire cultures — for good or ill.
This insight carries immense ethical and theological weight. Process theology suggests that God is not outside this field, but within it, as the divine lure toward healing. God does not overwrite the wound but moves with it, always offering the possibility of transformation without coercion.
In a metamodern world, where certainty has fractured but hope remains, the task is not to bypass pain but to inhabit it wisely. Our cultural maturity may depend on learning to hold collective wounds with honesty rather than weaponizing them into new fundamentalisms.
✨ “The remedy is the experience” is not a sentimental line; it is a processual truth.
Every wound participates in the world’s becoming.
Whether that participation heals or harms depends on how we meet it — individually and together.
Bibliography
1. Process Philosophy & Theology
Whitehead, Alfred North. Process and Reality. (1929) — foundational metaphysics of experience and becoming.
Cobb, John B. A Christian Natural Theology: Based on the Thought of Alfred North Whitehead. (1965).
Cobb, John B. and David Griffin. Process Theology: An Introductory Exposition. (1976).
Keller, Catherine. The Face of the Deep: A Theology of Becoming. (2003).
Keller, Catherine. Cloud of the Impossible: Negative Theology and Planetary Entanglement. (2014).
Suchocki, Marjorie Hewitt. God, Christ, Church: A Practical Guide to Process Theology. (1982).
Oord, Thomas Jay. The Uncontrolling Love of God. (2015).
Hartshorne, Charles. The Divine Relativity. (1948).
2. Psychoanalysis, Trauma, and Violence
Freud, Sigmund. Beyond the Pleasure Principle. (1920).
Winnicott, D. W. Playing and Reality. (1971).
Bion, Wilfred. Learning from Experience. (1962).
Lacan, Jacques. Écrits. (1966).
van der Kolk, Bessel. The Body Keeps the Score. (2014).
Herman, Judith. Trauma and Recovery. (1992).
Kohut, Heinz. The Analysis of the Self. (1971).
3. Phenomenology & Existentialism
Husserl, Edmund. Ideas Pertaining to a Pure Phenomenology. (1913).
Heidegger, Martin. Being and Time. (1927).
Merleau-Ponty, Maurice. Phenomenology of Perception. (1945).
Sartre, Jean-Paul. Being and Nothingness. (1943).
Camus, Albert. The Myth of Sisyphus. (1942).
Kierkegaard, Søren. The Sickness Unto Death. (1849).
de Beauvoir, Simone. The Ethics of Ambiguity. (1947).
4. Metamodernism & Cultural Analysis
Vermeulen, Timotheus & van den Akker, Robin. Notes on Metamodernism. (2010).
Gibbons, Alison. Metamodernism: Historicity, Affect, and Depth after Postmodernism. (2020).
Hanzi Freinacht. The Listening Society. (2017).
Alexander, Jeffrey. Cultural Trauma and Collective Identity. (2004).
Taylor, Charles. A Secular Age. (2007).
Bauman, Zygmunt. Liquid Modernity. (2000).
5. Language, Meaning, and Frege
Frege, Gottlob. On Sense and Reference. (1892).
Frege, Gottlob. The Foundations of Arithmetic. (1884).
Dummett, Michael. Frege: Philosophy of Language. (1973).
Beaney, Michael. The Frege Reader. (1997).
6. Interdisciplinary & Integrative Works
Frankl, Viktor. Man’s Search for Meaning. (1946).
hooks, bell. All About Love: New Visions. (2000).
Palmer, Parker J. Let Your Life Speak. (2000).
Neumann, Erich. Depth Psychology and a New Ethic. (1949).
Tutu, Desmond. No Future Without Forgiveness. (1999).
Moltmann, Jürgen. The Crucified God. (1972).
Kearney, Richard. The God Who May Be: A Hermeneutics of Religion. (2001).